What is the attraction to spanking
Elements of spanking that I find exciting
With the Internet, I think it has become easier for all of us into spanking to feel better about our personal feelings towards spanking. There seems to be safety in numbers and it is easier to feel less â€śpervertedâ€? knowing there are so many other people with similar feelings. We still have conservative politics and religion telling us that anything but the missionary position with our spouse is bad, but hopefully we are moving away from allowing these people to influence our lives. But what is it specifically that we like about spanking? For different people it is very different things, so I thought I would spend a moment discussing what it is that I find attractive about the fetish.
For some people it is as simple as the physical sensation of having their bottom smacked. There are nerve ending that are shared by our butts and our genitals that allow for cross stimulation. There are many people who are not into the â€śsceneâ€? that still get turned on by having a few well placed smacks on their bottom during sex. For me, and many others, the attraction to spanking goes well beyond the physical sensations that accompany it. One of the biggest attractions is voluntary submission. I am not talking about someone being tied down and being spanked, I am talking about someone submitting to a situation that they know is going to hurt like hell. This is a situation that if they chose to, they could tell the person to â€śF*** Offâ€? and could run away from. But, the commanding presence of a stern disciplinarian somehow creates a situation that they somehow submit to. This is made even more powerful when the person about to be spanked is made to assist in their own punishment. The removing of the clothes, the assuming of the position, the counting of the strokes, and having to hold completely still are elements in which the person being spanked is assisting in their own demise. These are powerful elements that I find to be the heart and soul of the fetish for me.
I am not a big fan of erotic spanking. For me spanking is a punishment based activity and without this element it does not do much for me. The concept of doing something bad that can result in someoneâ€™s bare bottom being presented, in often embarrassing positions, and then be spanked well beyond their comfort level, is more than just spanking, it is a punishment. For me it is a cause an effect situation. They know that certain behaviors that they engage in will result in them being spanked. If they choose to engage in these behaviors, the results are a painful spanking. It is not spanking for spankingâ€™s sake, the spanking has been earned. I also feel that it needs to be something that is not enjoyed by the person being spanked. This is often difficult, because as adults our spanking partners are consenting adults who are into being spanked. To take a spanking to the level of a punishment, for someone who enjoys the process, is often a difficult task. Creative disciplinarians are able to accomplish this task in various ways, but that is a entirely different discussion.
I like the strict and formal aspects of a spanking as well. To just grab someone and hold them in place for a spanking eliminates a lot of the thrill for me. As stated before, there is something seductive about requiring the person being punished to assist in the process. I like to make the process very formal and take as much time as needed to get the job done. It is appealing for me to make them assume the state of dress or undress required for their punishment. The act of sending them to get the implement is quite powerful. Anything that prolongs the actual spanking is effective in itself. The mental anguish that precedes the spanking is often a punishment in itself. If someone knows they are in for a particularly hard spanking, one that they cannot avoid, they often just want to get it over with. The more drawn out and formal the process, the worse it is for the one in trouble. I like to have them assume a position that leaves them feeling exposed and vulnerable. I will often take my time and fine tune their position in any way that I see fit. The more exposed they feel, the more effective the punishment is. Once again, I fine tune verbally and make them go through the effort of getting the position right. There are very few things more submissive than baring your bottom and grabbing your ankles in preparation to have it smacked very hard. Having them count is also very effective. Once again, they are helping with their punishment, and the act of counting the strokes is very formal.
I like to have requirements that are hard for them to meet during their spanking. This further adds to what is required of them during their spanking. To just spank them hard and fast and get it over with, with them kicking and struggling throughout, is really the easiest way for them to accept their spanking. But to require them to keep an accurate count as well as maintain the exact position you have placed them, further adds to the difficulty of them getting through it. This is a punishment and we want to make it as effective as possible. Having them count and maintain their position keeps them from being able to check out of their spanking mentally. They are not just required to take it, they are required to actively participate. Of course, should the requirements that are specified not be met, then the spanking does not end. The threat of additional punishment is a very powerful tool in making sure you get everything you are looking for from the punishment.
This is a topic that I could write about for a very long time. I will continue to revisit this theme in the days to come.