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Reflections from my first spanking party

In 2002 I attended my first spanking event which was the Shadowlane party in Palm Springs.  We went more for business efforts, launching at the time our first full scale production, “Road Trip” and the goal really was DVD sales and making industry contacts.  I did not participate in any of the fun, attend suite parties, or really do anything spanking related.  Well, I take that back, I gave exactly one spanking that weekend, it was late at night, in private, and Lady D asked me to give her a caning because she had never received an intense one before and felt it was important that she knew what the models experienced during a caning.  But up until last weekend, that was the extent of my experience with “play parties”, spanking events, or anything even similar.

People have found it surprising that I have never attended a play party, and I have found myself over the years trying to explain why.  I think the main reason is that I have already taken something that I love and has been important to me since I was very young and turned it into work.  I know, “waah, waah, waah, you spank girls for a living, please shut the fuck up about your problems”.  But my career path really has had a way of diluting something that is one of the strongest components of my sexuality.  This is why outside of work I have kept spanking as something that I only engage in for disciplinary purposes.  I have always been concerned that play parties would just further dilute this thing I love so much, plus, the disciplinary part of spanking does not exist at the level that I prefer when it comes to public spanking play.

So this past weekend I attended an event that I was invited to, that was officially my first party.  From what I understand it is smaller than most of the National events that take place, and I believe that it may have been invitation only.  I honestly had no idea what to expect, but after talking to a few folks that I know that would be attending, I decided to give it a try.  I have to be honest in saying that there was also the promise of receiving awards that I had recently received online (Thanks Spankingblogg) in person, which I thought would be a pretty cool experience.

So, I arrived on Thursday and checked into my room and sat there for a while trying to find the courage to get out and make an appearance.  Things started with me meeting the party host (the wondefully gracious Dr Lectr) and a few friends down at the bar and I was very glad to get to start things on a very small level.  You must understand, in the grand scope of things I am pretty shy.  I am not good in a room with people I do not know and I am certainly not the guy that walks up and starts a conversation with anyone.  So this was a nice way to get to know a few people before everyone arrived and things began to really get going, and at least allowed me a few folks to serve as anchors for me when the crowds began to arrive.

I returned to my room, knowing that just down the hall was the giant suite that all of the festivities would be taking place in.  I could hear that things were already starting as I walked down the hall to my room, but I still could not quite find the courage to go there just yet. The solution? As silly as it was, me acting like a freshman going to his first dance, I sat in my room and drank a couple of beers to get the courage to go and hang out with everyone.  You might think that I would be fully comfortable and that this might feel like my natural environment, but that was certainly not the case.

I finally got up the nerve and headed down the hall, where the sounds of spanking were already taking place.  I entered the enormous suite and it was all set up and ready for fun and socializing.  There was a lovely young lady getting a nice OTK spanking on the couch, so already I was enjoying the views.  There was a full bar, plenty of food, a massage table, a Saint Andrew’s Cross, many implements laid out, a full schedule for the weekend on the wall, and many folks standing around socializing.  Before I could fully adjust to my new surroundings…it began.  Many, very nice people began to approach me to tell me what big fans they were and how much they liked my work.  Certainly I get a lot of feedback via email and blogs and such, but I cannot say that I have really every met someone that has watched my videos, with the exception of models who I have hired that are spankos.  I am not really part of the industry scene and have chosen to hide myself on some remote land in the mountains of Colorado, so this was a very new experience.  I have gone through the last 20 years of my life hoping very much to never be recognized publicly, and here I am in a room full of people in which it seems just about everyone knows me in some way.  I found it to be very flattering, slightly overwhelming, and was quickly thankful for the two beers I had just drank.

Very quickly I was being introduced to so many wonderful people.  It was still a struggle at times as every person seemed to know every other person.  Whenever someone new walked in the door it was hugs and handshakes like they were greeting their long lost best friends for life.  It quickly became quite apparent to me that this was a very wonderful group of people who had developed some truly special friendships.  Yes, spanking might have been the connecting tissue that tied these relationships together, but it was becoming quite clear that there was so much more to this, and as the weekend progressed I would begin to understand.  People went way out there way to not only meet me, but to make me feel welcome.  As a blogger, I sometimes forget that I have an actual audience out there and it was quite surprising when people would share with me something they learned, loved, or referenced from something I had written.  On the video side of things many had a favorite scene of mine that they wanted to talk about, or a favorite model, or a story about how my content had in some way affected the young spanko within.  I heard stories that included someone stealing their parent’s credit card because they just had to join (bad girl by the way), to several who described finally coming out to their significant other by showing them one of my videos.  Yes, we are talking about spanking and not saving the world, but it filled me with pride, in a somewhat confusing way, to have had my work touch so many people in at least some manner.

It took some time to let my guard down and I still often found myself sitting alone in a chair by the bar just taking it all in.  While spanking was the one common thread to everyone there, while I sat and watched these people interact, there was another common thread…a smile.  I have been to bars, nightclubs, and parties of all sorts, but I have never in my life seen a group of people so genuinely happy.  These were not fake, one-sided, lustful, flirting interactions; these were people with genuine love for each other.  As someone who spent a very large part of my college experience studying social psychology, I could have done a whole dissertation on the interactions within this room.  The group dynamic was just amazing to watch, as well as the individual interactions between people.  I watched two well-known industry models reunite after 2 days, 2 weeks, 2 months; I have no idea how long, and watched as they actually pet each other on the arms, belly, and hips the whole time they spoke.  In any other situation that would have seemed flirty or romantic and would have drawn attention, but in this environment, it was just the norm.  They were just really happy to see each other and in this wonderfully safe environment they were able to express themselves in whatever way they chose without fear of being judged and without causing someone else to feel jealous.  I witnessed true honesty of emotions and interactions, and it was amazing to watch an entire room of people just really be themselves. 

I eventually learned to relax over the course of the first evening and tried my very best to act like everyone else was, meaning, being myself and letting my guard down.  There were a few wonderfully bratty young ladies who helped ease me into all of this by being genuinely playful (meaning they began to politely fuck with me), which helped me feel quite welcome in this new environment.  I did my best to try and start circulating around the room, inviting new conversations, which typically led to us talking about my work.  This was still a bit of a struggle, but I really appreciate people sharing their stories with me, and none of this would ever have been possible without any of these people.  But it is still an adjustment when at the very root of most of the stories, while not being said, is “you know the favorite thing that you ever did that I masturbated to”.  There was one person, who I will not name, that I was talking to and they kept saying you seem very familiar, I am sure I have met you at one of these parties before (for context, I simply introduce myself as “Mike” and leave it at that).  It was part way into this conversation that this person turned bright red as they all of a sudden figured out how they knew me.

Early in my career when there were a dozen or so spanking producers out there, I worked really hard to develop relationships with them all through email so we could work together and not against each other.  But since my return to the industry in 2009 after a short break, I really stopped with that process.  There were just too many sites out there so I just continued to do my own thing.  I do not look at much in the way of spanking content anymore, so I have really lost track of who’s who in the industry or really what sites are out there.  During this weekend I got to meet so very many people in the industry and I was genuinely impressed.  You know it was a good night when you start off talking to Tony and Eve from Shadowlane, the early pioneers of our industry, and end the evening talking with Sarah Gregory and AAASpanking, clearly the future of this industry.

I also had the pleasure of meeting many super star spanking models over the course of the weekend.  It is clear, just by looking at these incredibly gorgeous young ladies why they are so very popular in the industry.  But I had the unique opportunity to meet them before someone told me that they were well known models.  I have a strong feeling that these ladies are so popular with the producers not just because they are gorgeous, and not just because they can take a good spanking, but they were just a joy to be around.  Many of them were indeed working that weekend and filming for various producers, but that seemed to be a side note for them. They were there to have fun like everyone else, and it quickly became clear that they may indeed have been the biggest spankos in the room.  They were fun and social and played as much as everyone else.  I think the hottest thing I had the privilege to watch the entire weekend, as it was being done somewhat privately (OK, sorry I invited myself), was a double strapping and then caning of a very well-known model.  This was not for pay, this was not for an audience, it was clearly being done for her pleasure and it was strict and amazing.

I have only hired three models over the course of my career, that have ever filmed for another spanking website and they were all there.  Clearly, we have only had a business relationship, which has been limited to the short amount of time they have spent in my studio when they fly in for a shoot.  It made me feel so good that when I saw each of them I was greeted with such a warm hug.  It felt like meeting an old friend and none of them treated me like I was the guy that hired them for spanking videos.  It was like seeing my best friend after years apart and it really made me feel good.  I want to personally thank all three of you (you know who you are) for really making feel at home and taking the time to introduce me to so many of the amazing people I met.  Speaking of amazing people, a big thanks to Miss Adriana Evans the spankee of the year for making me feel like I have been to every spanking party before this one and trying to include me in so many different ways.  Also a big thanks to a few brats who decided to make this event as fun as possible for me and keeping me on my game (you also know who you are). It was also very nice to get to go to dinner with Kajira and her man, and have real conversations beyond where to look as I am spanking you on camera, it was truly a pleasure.

I had no idea what to expect from this whole experience, but left with so much more than I could have asked for.  I learned that public and playful spankings can indeed but something fun to share with like-minded individuals, even without a disciplinary element. I learned that when a group of people, who have to some degree hidden an important part of their sexuality, get together and just not worry about the conservative teachings of the past, or how their kink can affect their job or their relationships, and they can just be themselves for a few days, the results can only be described as magical.  I made so very many good friends this weekend, friendships that I think we last for a very long time.  I may not see them anytime soon, but I guarantee the next time I am the nervous guy to walk into that suite at the end of the hall, I will see those people and I will be the one to greet and hug them like old friends. Thank you all for an amazing time.

Posted by Michael Masterson on 03/03 at 11:22 AM


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